Two days in another paradise

Most people would say I live in paradise. Most of the time, I would have to agree with them. But even when you live in paradise, there are times when you just have to get away. So where does a girl from Ibiza go to when she needs a weekend mini-break, with not too much time spent in transit, and she wants nothing but relaxation, sunshine, food, the occasional cocktail and (most importantly) peace? Formentera, obvs. Last weekend I was lucky enough to be able to escape the hustle and bustle of Ibiza life for a full 48 hours on Ibiza’s bohemian little sister island. It might not sound like much, but every minute in Formentera feels like10 in Ibiza time. Time seems to go slower over there – it’s just so relaxed, there’s nowhere to be at any given time, no commitments, no rush, no stress, no pasa nada…

If you asked me what I did for two days, I’d find it difficult to explain it to you. There was food. There was sleep. There was a scooter. There were beaches. There were a lot of knots in my hair. There was a lot of sun (I came home with a tan!). There were two sunsets. There was crystal clear water. There was an amazing little burger shack. There were boquerones on deck chairs on some rocks. There were mojitos in the sand. There were tins of beer. There were hippies (and I don’t mean modern day bohos – I mean the real deal, leftover from the 60s and playing psychedelic guitar). There was nothing but happiness. But if you asked me where any of that stuff took place, I swear, I couldn’t tell you. It all just flowed beautifully into one place after another.

You see, that’s the beauty of Formentera to me. Unlike Ibiza, when you go off the beaten track in Formentera, there are no websites to guide you to the cool, hip hangouts. There are no magazines telling you what dish is famous in what restaurant. No celebrities setting trends, though I must say, I think a lot of the people of Formentera are VERY stylish indeed – effortless chic. No ‘underground haunts’ or ‘residents faves’ – well, of course there are, but you have to BE a resident or know one, you can’t just read about it and turn up! Sure – you’ve got your Beso Beach and Juan y Andrea. There are million dollar boats clogging up the crystalline sea at Illetes. There’s a Michelin starred restaurant. There’s even Cocoon parties at the teensy tiny club Tipic. But that’s not my Formentera. That’s Formentera for the Ibiza jet set. My Formentera is totally chilled.

Formentera is like unexplored territory for me. I don’t bump into someone I know on every corner. I don’t care about wearing make-up. I’m not worried if my bikini doesn’t exactly match my kaftan. And – amazingly after living in Ibiza for such a long time – you do not hear a single 4/4 beat in any restaurant, shop or bar. Formentera is blissfully stuck in the 80s and 90s, complete with a stadium and classic rock soundtrack, with the occasional mullet and skinhead to match (I didn’t say they were ALL stylish). As I boarded the ferry back to Ibiza on Monday morning, ready to head back to another week of work, it was impossible to feel sad about leaving. How could you, when coming back to Ibiza is reality? But it’s definitely a tale of two islands for me – one for work and play, the other for total disconnection and relaxation. I’m not sure you’d really like it. Yep, actually, forget I ever said anything. Formentera is terrible. Horrible. Hate the place. Wouldn’t recommend it to anyone…