Oh hi, Hï Ibiza

Oh hi, Hï Ibiza! Welcome to our world… So apart from officially discovering the club’s name, clocking its logo and watching the slick promo video that came with news of the launch, we’ve still got plenty to be intrigued about when it comes to Ushuaïa Entertainment’s newest venture. The biggest question of course – when is the opening party? The next obvious ones – what will the club programming be like? Who will be the DJs with residencies? And (from nostalgia fans and lovers of evolution alike) what exactly have they done to the club that was once so revered?

All in good time, dear readers. If there’s anything we’ve learnt about the Ushuaïa marketing team over the past few years it’s that they’ve always got a vision. They are creative when it comes to concepts and artwork and outlandish and OTT when it comes to production (oh, and let’s not forget witty – ‘Let’s Dants’ has to be one of my favourite ever billboards). Here’s what the pretty darn cool video shows us. A dreamlike, nonsensical sequence featuring fox heads, Es Vedra, cow skulls, confetti, artsy statues, smoke machines, watermelons, a Land Rover Defenders, a whole load of vinyl, swings, dancers, creepy masks, tongues… Oh hey – why am I trying to put it into words? Why don’t you watch for yourself here?

And here’s what the official press release tells us for now (my sincere apologies to those who have read this 3000 times already today, but I’m just covering all bases for those who may have been busy, I don’t know, WORKING or something like that all day!). Hï Ibiza ‘aims to unite the highest standards of music and entertainment, bringing world class music experiences to a club designed with the dancer in mind’. Does this mean more dance floor, less VIP? Time will tell. Hï Ibiza is a ‘state of the art club that will showcase the most exciting names in electronic music throughout the summer, from the biggest stars in the scene to the leading lights of the underground’. Vague, to say the least. It also plans to ‘stay true to the open-minded spirit of Ibiza’ and continue the ‘island’s legacy as the party capital of the world’. Well that’s just delightful.

Last of all, here’s what I think we need to remember. Hï ibiza is not ‘the new Space’. It’s not really ‘the old Space’ either – it just so happens to be sitting on the same piece of prime clubbing real estate. It also sits opposite another prime piece of clubbing real estate which happens to be owned by the same people and so given that Ushuaïa Ibiza Beach Club is a day venue and Hï Ibiza sounds like it’s going to be a night venue, it wouldn’t surprise me if a bridge or tunnel (or perhaps both) is built between the two, making the pilgrimage from one to the other a new summer ritual (who remembers going from Manumission to Carry On at Space? Like that, minus the disco bus. And probably also without the sex shows. But who knows?). Since the news was announced a few hours ago, it seems that everyone and their cats already have an opinion about Hï Ibiza, and I for one am excited to see some changes in clubland. And now that the rumour about the name has finally been put to rest, can we please move onto something else now? Suggestions on a postcard please.